Courting Lady Welrod
by usedcarjockey
Summary: As a summary of the two year time skip between Chess Pieces One and Two, the short-story collection Courting Lady Welrod documents the growing relationship between Welrod Mk II and Commander Eric Blair, as well as tying up loose ends in Scotland.
1. Bar Knight Fight

**Bar Knight Fight**

The sun was beginning to set in Edinburgh, its golden rays casting the shadow of a girl carrying a box of nutrients for her comrades upon the darkened paved road. A mere human would have collapsed from exhaustion after a mere twenty trips, however, Welrod Mk II was on her fiftieth and last trip, barely breaking a sweat. Although, she did feel quite famished.

"Sir, that's the last box of rations," Welrod called out as she slammed the final crate down into the rear of the two and a half ton truck.

"Splendid work, Miss Welrod! Hop into the cab and we shall be off on our merry way," a soft kind voice replied, barely heard over the roaring engine of the truck. Commander Eric Blair had accompanied Welrod on her first mission as adjutant: that being the collection of rations from the nearby town of Edinburgh. Flour, meat, vegetables, and all sorts of dairy products were accounted for and packed into the rear bed of the truck. On arrival, these ingredients would be sent off to the kitchens, where Springfield would work her magic, crafting the most delectable of suppers.

Welrod sauntered up to the cab of the truck and climbed inside, sitting beside her commander who was busily adjusting his GPS.

"You know Sir, you could just have me give you directions, I am trained in cartography of over fifty countries including Scotland," Welrod stated as she watched her commander struggle with the exact coordinates.

"Miss Welrod, I appreciate your assistance, however I do not require your aid at this time. Sit back and get some rest, we will be back at Sector 78 before you know it!" Eric replied as he finally plugged in the coordinates and accelerated down the road.

 _Alright Sir, don't say I didn't want to help you._

Welrod raised her legs and rested them on the dash and dozed off, the methodical sound of the truck's engine fading as she passed into unconsciousness.

 _Thump, thump, thump_

With a start, Welrod woke up to the sound of a repetitive thumping noise coming from inside the cab. The truck had stopped at the side of the road, high beams casting their light upon the darkness ahead of them.

 _Thump, thump, thump_

The girl looked to her left to see her commander repeatedly slamming his head against the top of the steering wheel, beyond frustrated at the piece of technology that had led them astray. Welrod glanced at the clock: it was now half past ten. They should have arrived at base half an hour ago.

"Sir, are you alright?"

The man stopped his self-abuse for a moment and looked back at Welrod.

"Oh, I'm doing just swell Miss Welrod. This piece of human creation has taken us on a tour of the Scottish countryside. Isn't that lovely? How thoughtful of it!" The man then turned to the GPS, "If only I WANTED TO TAKE A SUNDAY DRIVE!"

 _Recalculating Nyah~_

"QUIET YOU!"

With a burst of anger the man repeatedly slammed down on the horn, interrupting the still night with the sound of spastic honking.

"Sir… I think you need to take a breather, hold on let me see if there's a town nearby," Welrod replied concerned as she opened up the glove compartment and procured a map horribly out of date. The girl glanced at where the GPS roughly placed them and located the spot on their roadmap. Luckily for them there was a town just north of them that could provide a place to recuperate.

"Alright Sir, there's a town half a click north of here, let's pull in and ask for directions, even grab a bite to eat, sound like a plan," Welrod asked in as soothing of a tone as she could.

"A-Alright. Get me there," Blair replied through gritted teeth. The truck again started rolling down the road, its engine returning to its rumbling cadence.

 _Recalculating Nyah~_

"I'm going to turn that off now Sir."

The party drove in silence down the unlit road, spotting a faint glow in the distance. As they approached, the faint outline of a building appeared out of the darkness. The party pulled into a parking spot and exited the truck. Welrod glanced up at the bar sign, spotting the name of the establishment swinging in the breeze: Kong's Arms. On the door of the bar was another, more foreboding sign: No Androids Allowed.

"Hmm, not friendly are they?" Welrod said with a bit of a chuckle.

"Eh, they will hardly notice, much less be sober enough to stand. Come now Miss Welrod, let's grab a bite and some directions."

Blair opened the door and let his compatriot enter the establishment first. Inside, patrons were huddled underneath hanging televisions playing the latest football match. Off to the side, the bartender was wiping off the top of the mahogany counter with a rag, and upon noticing the two companions motioned for them to saunter over. Welrod, with Blair behind her, calmly approached the counter and sat side by side on two empty barstools.

"Ain't from round 'ere are ye?" The gruff bartender mumbled.

"I'm afraid not, we happened to get lost on our return to S-"before Blair could respond he received an elbow from his compatriot, "-Shotts."

"Aye so you two really aren't from round 'ere; you two on a date or somethin?"

The two companions' faces flushed a deep red hue as they stammered out a response.

"N-no we were out collecting s-supplies for… charity!" Blair blustered.

"Y-yes we were gathering food for the… the… orphanage!" Welrod added.

"Whatever. What can I get you for?"

"Rum and coke for myself, and for my companion…" Blair responded as he glanced at his companion.

"A medium dry martini, lemon peel. Shaken, not stirred." Welrod replied.

"We don't 'ave that fancy drink 'ere…" the bartender said as he stopped wiping down the counter.

"She'll have what I'm having." Blair continued, as he looked at his adjutant with a nod.

With a grunt, the bartender bent down and procured two glasses, a rum bottle, and two coke cans. The man proceeded to pour out the drinks for the two companions and returned to his work.

"Bottoms up Wells!"

"Cheers Sir."

Both patrons clinked their glasses and took a sip, gently setting them down a moment later.

"Ah… now that was refreshing. Would you like me to order some appetizers Miss Wells? Miss Wells? Wells?" Blair repeated to his companion, who was staring blankly ahead.

"Hmm… oh… yes that would be fine *hic*"

"Right… bartender, could you please prepare the pigs in a blanket for us?"

"I bet they're warm and toasty!" Welrod added happily.

"Y-yes… I would assume so," Blair replied confused, Welrod's grammar usually was not this casual.

The girl took another sip of her drink as a large man sat down next to her. The girl let out another hiccup as she turned to address her newfound companion.

"Hello!" Welrod chirped, only to be met with a grunt in reply.

"My Commander and I are on a road trip! Isn't that lovely?!"

"Good for you I guess…" the rotund man replied.

Put off, Welrod decided to inform the man of his ungentlemanly conduct, much to Blair's immediate concern.

"Oi! That's now how you're supposed to treat a *hic* Lady! Tell him commander!" Welrod looked towards her companion who was trying to appear lost in his drink.

"Hey, you! Could you tell your woman to piss off?"

"I apologize Sir, I did not know my companion could not hold her lager, especially only after a single drink…"

"Hey! I can *hic* hold my lager better than *hic* you can~" Welrod slurred.

"I know you can Miss Wells, just calm down and…"

"You don't have to be so *hic* formal commander. You should *hic* refer to me *hic* by name: Welrod Mk II!"

Every patron in the bar stopped what they were doing and stared down the two companions, one blissfully unaware, and the other beyond panicking.

"Oi! The bloody sign said no androids allowed!" The bartender called out from the back.

"I'm not just a T-Doll thank you very much, I'm Blair's COMPANION!"

"Y-yes Sir, we will be leaving immediately. Please give our appetizers to the… lovely patrons. Sorry to bother you all! Don't mind us, just go back to your soccer game…"

The large man sitting next to them stood up and blocked their path, glaring at the man he towered over by at least a head.

"What the fook jou just say?"

"Ehehe that we will be kindly leaving…"

"Didn't you hear him you engorged drunkard? He said soccer. S-O-C-C-E-R! Hehe, how BOLD of you Sir!" Welrod was officially out of commission; Blair would have to cope with this on his own.

"If there's two things in this world that I hate wif a passion, its androids, and fookin Yankees pretending to be posh." The man cracked his knuckles and let out a wicked smile.

"Blair's not scared of you! Right commander!?" Welrod chirped.

Blair looked back at his companion to retort, but out of the corner of his eye spotted a fist swinging for his head. Fluidly, Blair dipped his head left and dodged the blow, effortlessly moving behind the attacker and slammed the villains head into the counter. Another patron approached Blair from the side, swinging his right hand in a hook towards Eric's jaw. Blair deflected it away, and countered with an uppercut to the man's gut, causing the man to stumble backwards winded.

"Hehe, there's a bear with a chair behind you!" Welrod warned.

Without thinking, Blair ducked feeling a heavy object ruffle the edges of his hair. The barstool impacted against Welrod's frame, shattering on impact.

"That was very rude!" Welrod said unphased.

In an effort to end this charade, Blair turned to his adversary in a fury, repeatedly slamming his fists into his chest again and again, his opponent stumbling backward under the repeated blows. Before he could land a decisive strike however, the man from earlier grappled around Blair's chest. Eric slammed his head backward, breaking his assailant's nose and sending him plummeting to the ground.

"Miss Welrod! Your assistance is required!" Eric yelled as he was picked up and thrown over the counter.

"You're doing splendid Sir! You can handle those… whoops!"

Welrod had attempted to seat herself but missed entirely falling down and landing on top of the recovering assailant's hand with a sickening crunch.

"Oh! Deary me!"

Meanwhile, Blair had recovered from his flight and threw himself back across the counter, into the large man's chest causing both of them to crash through one of the tables, spilling the drinks of two more patrons. This was all that was required for the bar to spring into an all-out brawl, as patrons started wailing on one another without mercy. Blair gave the large man one last punch, before rolling off of him and returning to his companion, who was happily crushing his other assailant's arm.

"Get… this… bitch… off!" The pained man sputtered.

"Such vulgar *hic* language! You need only ask politely! *hic*" Welrod retorted.

"Miss Welrod, I believe it's time to go. I'll find us a more pleasant eatery." Blair said as he helped his companion to her feet.

"How gentlemanly of you Sir. Isn't my commander so wonderful?" Welrod asked the groaning victim.

"Apologies for the hand my good man, but I dare say you earned it," Blair called out as he bolted out of the bar with Welrod giggling at his heels.

The two mounted the truck and stepped on the accelerator, the bar soon disappearing into the darkness once more. Blair let out a sigh of relief as he looked at the GPS.

 _Recalculating Nyah~_

"To hell with it," the man muttered as he turned the GPS off and drove silently down the road. He then turned to his companion, who was smiling out the window.

"Are you alright Miss Welrod? That was a mighty hit you sustained…"

"Oh Commander I'm fine, T-Dolls can take more than that puny whiff. Although… *yawn* I do think I'm going to have a nap." The girl stretched as she tried to make herself comfortable, her eyes only half open.

"By all means Miss Welrod, rest your eyes and-"Eric stiffened as Welrod gently laid her head on his left thigh.

"You have soft legs Sir…"

"Uh… I… uh…"

"Thank you for taking me out to dinner, it was a wonderful evening."

"N-not a problem Miss Welrod. Rest easy now."

"Mhmm…" Welrod replied as her breathing pattern eased and she drifted off into a dreamless slumber.

 _Right, no drinking for that one. Was that really just a rum and coke? That's all it took? Oh well, at least she enjoyed herself._

Eric then hesitantly reached his hand down and ruffled Welrod's hair a bit, before returning his hand to the wheel and focusing on the long road back to Glasgow taking care not to move a muscle lest he disturb his sleeping companion.


	2. Meet the Archibalds

**Meet the Archibalds**

"Miss Welrod, I do believe that outfit suits you!"

Eric Blair said happily as he watched his companion admire her third outfit of the afternoon. After catching word of Echelon 3 losing most of their belongings, Commander Blair went out of his way to secure proper clothing for the girls of Welrod's squad. Thus, to him at least, it was only logical to assist Welrod in shopping, as he was the one to foot the bill. In reality, Welrod knew it was really because Blair wanted to see her try on cute clothing. Luckily for him, she didn't mind.

"You think so, Sir? I don't know about the diamond pattern on these tights. They seem a bit gaudy." Welrod replied.

She was wearing a blue and yellow skirt over a pair of blue tights, the sides stitched with cream colored diamonds from the hip to the ankle. The top consisted of a white, collared undershirt and a blue blouse, with a blue and yellow bow tied neatly at the base of her neck. It would have gone perfectly with her cream colored sweater, if it wasn't burned by Archibald and his ilk.

"Nonsense it looks absolutely fine! Although, Calico may have a few words when it comes to the colors," Blair chuckled as he got up from his seat and collected the plethora of packages and bags containing Echelon 3's well-earned loot. It didn't take long before the top half of the man was completely obscured by the mass of gifts.

"Are you sure you don't need assistance Sir? I am more than happy to share the load," Welrod asked concerned as she watched the top of the pile naturally sway back and forth. The lightest of breezes could send these packages not only tumbling to the ground, but more importantly to her, on top of her commander.

 _Bzzzt. Bzzzt. Bzzzt._

"I can handle a few packages Miss Welrod… although could you grab my phone out of my back pocket, I do believe I have an incoming call," Blair replied politely as he swung his body around so Welrod could retrieve the buzzing cell phone. Gingerly, the girl removed the phone from the man's back pocket and looked at the caller ID.

"It's James, Sir. I'll place him on speaker." The girl hit the connect button and then speakerphone. Mass chaos and the sounds of air raid sirens letting forth their mournful cry disturbed the peaceful atmosphere of the department store. James's gruff voice, in distress, called out through the speaker.

"|to someone in the background| Oi! I wan' two squads on the ramparts pronto… Welrod? Commander? Are you there Sir and Ma'am?"

"We hear you loud and clear James, what seems to be the disturbance," Blair asked, remaining as calm as possible to avoid making the situation worse.

"They're back Sir! |to someone else in the background| I want Echelon 3 on the helipad NOW! We can't let them enter the compound!"

"Who's back, Sir? Sangvis Ferri?" Welrod asked, not attempting to hide the growing concern in her voice.

"Worse… an Archibald is back, and he's not alone."

The faces on the two companions darkened simultaneously as the name of their sworn enemy was uttered. Welrod glanced at Eric, who was gritting his teeth, doing his best not to vent his frustrations so openly.

"I hate to cut this date short…"

"IT'S NOT A DATE!" The two companions yelled back at the receiver at the same time. They then looked at one another timidly before looking away just as fast.

"Aye… that's what I'd tell Cally every time we'd go out on patrol together. Now get your arses back 'ere pronto!"

With that last comment, James hung up the phone, leaving the two to stew over what they were about to deal with. Wordlessly, Welrod and Blair paid the cashier, and loaded the truck driving the short distance back to base from downtown Glasgow, the speedometer never going below one hundred kilometers per hour. The two drove through the front gate and turned towards the helipads. There was a G&K Black Hawk sitting on helipad two, with a young man in a commander's uniform under the armed guard of Grizzly and Calico. Eric pulled the truck over, set his beret, exited the vehicle, and stormed over to the intruder in a fury, Welrod in hot pursuit. The G&K Officer, barely over the age of twenty, upon seeing the new arrivals, straightened himself and gave a quick salute.

"Edmund Archibald. G&K Commander of Sector 6, Yorck, England reporting for-"

"I told you lot that if you EVER came back here there would be hell to pay!" Blair said sticking a finger into the chest of the new arrival, all intentions of acting like a gentleman completely gone. Eric towered over the young commander, his eyes blazing with menace.

"I-I-I just wanted to ask if I-I-I could…" the lad stammered, as he tried to formulate a response.

Blair's eyes narrowed, causing the new blood to panic more; sweat dripped down his freckled covered and highly trimmed face.

"W-w-what I m-mean is I-I'm a n-n-new Commander see and…"

"You have five seconds to explain why you're here. Or my associate Miss Welrod will find out the hard way," Blair stated as he motioned for Welrod to step forward. The girl put her gloves on with a snap, sending a chill down the spine of the new commander.

"I-I-I just w-wanted to ap-ap-ap-"

"Eddie! Stop being so nervous you big dummy… *gasp!*" a new feminine voice called out from the helicopter. The door slid open, revealing a girl only slightly younger than Edmund, dressed in a white summer skirt and top. Excitedly, the girl jumped out and ran towards the trio of tense individuals, and behind her a single IDW unit jumped out calling after her.

"Cordelinyah! Return to the helicopter at once! Your father's orders!" yelled an IDW in a blue security outfit at the head of the pack.

The voice of the feline PDW caused Blair to immediately freeze up as his eyes traced the cat-eared doll as it ran closer and closer. Welrod lifted her pistol, training it on the oncoming individual when Archibald stepped in the way blocking the shot.

"Please hold your fire ma'am!" Edmund cried out while Welrod tried to get a line of sight on a potential threat. But before she could find her again, the girl was already upon her, her eyes filled with wonder and amazement.

"Emerald eyes… I've never seen one of you before… you're so pretty!" The girl giggled as she held Welrod's free hand clasped in her own. "Isn't she beautiful Mr. Blair?" The girl continued, as she circled Welrod, who had become just as stiff as her commander.

"Uh… y-yes, Miss Welrod is quite b-beautiful," Eric replied as his face reddened. Meanwhile, the IDW had finally caught up with the girl and walked over to Blair.

"A thousand pardons Sir, Miss Cordelinyah was supposed to remain in the helicopter Nyah," the pdw doll stated eloquently.

The utterance of Nyah caused Blair to twitch a bit, however Cordelia prevented any unprofessional response by turning her attention to the dolls with their guns still leveled at them.

"Are those yours too? I love your hair, green is so your color!" Cordelia directed to Calico.

"Aw… thanks Dearie… ouch! Hey!" Calico replied as she was elbowed in the stomach by Grizzly.

"They're still Archibalds, probably have a plan to assassinate the commander and Welrod! Keep your gun on them dammit!" Grizzly muttered.

"Cordelia, I told you to remain in the helicopter until I requested if I could bring a guest," Edmund stated calmly to his sister, finally over the intimidation of Blair.

"I wanted to see Mr. Blair's pretty dolls though!" she pouted, puffing her cheeks up and crossed her arms as she looked back at Calico and Grizzly. "I mean look at them, they're so cute and cool looking! The one next to the green haired one looks really sweet! Oh, Welrod, that ribbon matches you perfectly," the girl continued as she gently pulled on the ribbon beneath Welrod's neck.

"Um… t-thank you Miss, I appreciate the compliment," Welrod replied, utterly confused. Were these truly the same Archibalds as the one they had dealt with several months prior?

"Ugh… Commander Blair, I apologize for my sister's rudeness. I do hope you can forgive her."

Cordelia stuck out her tongue at Edmund before turning her gaze back to Welrod.

"Do you want to meet my friend? This is DeeDee! She's my bodyguard, but also a master at tea parties!" The IDW straightened herself up and walked over to Welrod, extending her hand towards the still frozen girl.

"IDW at your service, most call me DeeDee. Pleasure to meet you Nyah."

"It is... a pleasure to make your acquaintance Miss DeeDee, Welrod Mk II at your service." Welrod glanced nervously at her commander, who was still stiff. The IDW picked up on this too.

"It appears as I am unwanted at this time Nyah. I leave the health of Master Cordelinyah in your hands, Master Edmund." With a swift bow, the IDW retreated to the helicopter, Blair loosening up the further the feline pdw got.

"Right, um... I do believe we should start over. I am Commander Edmund Archibald, I believe I have the pleasure of greeting Commander Eric Blair, is that correct?" The lad reaches his hand towards Blair, who was returning to his senses.

"Y-yes. Commander Eric Blair at your service. This is my associate and adjutant Miss Welrod. Now, I would kindly ask what you are doing in my Sector. This is a restricted area."

"W-well Sir, I was being deployed to Sector 6 and our route took us near your compound. We learned about what Thomas did and… we wanted to make amends," Edmund replied, staring down at his feet.

"Thomas?" Welrod asked.

"Our brother. Probably referred to himself only as Archibald. We love him but he… he has an odd way of pursuing his goals," Cordelia muttered.

 _That's an understatement Miss._

"Well, we shall see if your family can earn back our good graces. Miss Welrod, escort Miss Cordelia inside and give her a good meal. Edmund, you will take a walk with me so that we may discuss… grievances."

"Yes Sir, come with me Miss Cordelia, I will show you my echelon's living quarters," Welrod said as she extended her hand for Cordelia to take.

"I can't wait! This will be so much fun!" The girls made their way back to the compound, Cordelia wasting no time in introducing herself to Calico and Grizzly, while Blair steered Edmund towards the ramparts.

"You and I have much to discuss, about what happened, about what will happen, and about how your family can save face," Blair said sternly as he looked down at the black haired commander.

"Y-yes Sir, I await your grievances with utmost curiosity."

The two gentlemen ascended the catwalk and looked out across the vast field in front of the compound, still marred by the Battle of Glasgow many months before. Blair rested his hand on the metal parapet, and shut his eyes, pondering what he was about to say.

"You mentioned, Edmund that you love your brother that you love your family, is that correct?"

"Yes Sir, with all my heart."

"What would you do, if someone hurt your family? If they hurt your sister, Cordelia?"

"I… I would retaliate without question, without empathy, Sir."

"These girls… are my family. I know each of their names, their pasts, their preferences, and I respect each and every one of them, not only for the fine soldiers they have become but the kind women they've grown to be. Your brother Thomas, hurt them. He hurt my family, and that is something I can never forgive."

"I agree Sir, I don't-"

"Let me finish. One of these echelons I hold near and dear to my heart. Your brother hurt them the most, and I take that as not only an attack on them, but an attack on me. The squad leader of that echelon, is a girl I care a great deal about, and if it were not for her actions, I'm afraid you and I would not be discussing this today."

Blair opened his eyes again and stared into Edmunds soul.

"I want you to answer this question honestly: Your brother challenged me to a duel, he cheated, and fate deemed he be punished for it. I had every right in the world to end his life, however I chose to abstain. In my position, would you do the same?"

Edmund lowered his head, and pondered Blair's question, before looking Blair in the eye and responding without hesitation.

"If I were you, my brother would be dead and buried."

The young lad then paused, looked away for a moment, and turned back to Blair and followed up with his own question.

"Sir, why didn't you?"

"I didn't because I pity your brother Thomas. He will never find true companionship. The way he treats those beneath him, be it human or T-doll, will never buy him friendship outside his circle of yes-men. As a commander, you must remember that those you command look to you for guidance, compassion, and courage. Your brother chose to leave his people in the darkness. I urge you to not make the same mistake."

"I promise Sir, I'll treat my subordinates as my family, not only for my own sake, but theirs."

"See that you do. With that unpleasantness out of the way, I have a few more questions for you young Sir, firstly: why is it you don't seem to have as much of a negative affinity towards T-Dolls?"

"Cordelia and I were brought up under Dee's care. I suppose we found that she was more human than my older brother and mother would have cared to admit. I have come to find they are resourceful, honest, and…" the lad's face suddenly turned bright red.

"And…?"

"They're cute Sir."

"Ah, don't be ashamed Edmund, plenty of commander's have come to view their companions as something more, why I have my heart set on-"

"It's Miss Welrod isn't it Sir?"

"Eh?"

"Miss Welrod, your adjutant and bodyguard. She's the one you really care about right?"

"H-how did you know?"

"It's obvious Sir."

"Is it really?"

"Yep."

The two sat in awkward silence for a while, before the two started to chuckle which then transformed into tumultuous laughter.

"Dearie me, I should be more subtle," Blair finally responded as he wiped a tear from his eye, "anyways, on to the next question: what was it that drew you to join G&K in the first place?"

"I-I suppose it's because I wanted to protect those I care about. Now… I have a larger family to look after."

"Good lad, now last question, and this one is an absolute bugger," Blair said with a cheeky grin growing on his face, "Legs, or chest?"

"P-Pardon Sir?"

"Legs… or chest… one or the other young Sir."

"Uh… I-I suppose legs?"

Blair smiled as he clapped the young man on the back.

"You and I are more alike than you realize, now let's return to the compound, your sister is probably getting worried."

 _Meanwhile_

"You're going to look sooo pretty WAWA!" Cordelia chirped as she was finishing setting WA2000's hair into a bun.

The girl had her cheeks puffed out in an attempt at pouting, but even the quickest of glances could show that she was enjoying herself, much to the delight of Calico and Grizzly, who were snickering in the corner. Lee-Enfield was secretly taking notes, as she had a feeling WA2000 would like to keep this hairstyle around, at the very least for grand balls and other extravagant parties.

Welrod in the meantime was gazing out the window at the two figures atop the outer wall, their stoic outlines plastered against the blue sky. The taller figure clapped the smaller on the back. Welrod let out a small grin.

 _I'm proud of you Sir; continue to be the bigger person._

Before the girl could do anything else, her arms were gripped by both Grizzly and Calico, who started dragging the girl towards the makeshift barber's chair.

"Your turn your majesty!" Calico giggled.

"Ladies, this is unnecessary! I declare a formal protest to these events," Welrod cried as she was dragged closer and closer to the stool.

"Eh, you'll be fine, worst case scenario you shave it off," Grizzly snickered.

"You will do no such thing!"

 _A short while later._

Edmund and Blair had entered the compound once more and walked towards Echelon 3's dormitory. Blair led the way, opening the steel door and immediately freezing in the door frame, in shock at what he was setting his eyes upon.

"Tada!" Cordelia chirped as she turned Welrod around.

The girl's ponytails were untied, letting her now neatly brushed golden hair flow onto her shoulders. Welrod brushed a stray lock from the front of her face as she looked at Blair, smiling as she did.

"Hello Sir, I seem to have received an upgrade."

"Miss Welrod, I say you look rather dashing."

"A.K.A. You look hot girl!" Grizzly whispered to Calico, resulting in more snickering.

Edmund entered the room shortly thereafter, and was rushed by Cordelia.

"Eddie! These girls are so nice! They let me brush their hair and everything! Tommy took away their beds and couches! Isn't that rude?"

"Did my brother do this, Miss Welrod?"

"I'm afraid so, he insisted on no personal belongings," Welrod replied, maintaining an even tone despite the anger bubbling in her throat.

"I will have to speak to my father about this, unlike mother he has a fondness for you girls, I'm sure he could think of something."

"I'm sure they would appreciate it young Edmund, now ladies, and of course a gentleman, Miss Springfield has prepared a fantastic dinner for us, and I say we get to it before the rest of the base realizes it!" Blair exclaimed as he motioned for the entourage to leave the dormitory.

"Sweet! I heard it's barbecue tonight!" Grizzly yelled as she led Calico, Lee, and WA2000 out the door.

"They have a Springfield too! Come on Eddie let's go say hi!" Cordelia cried as she pulled her brother out the door.

"I will see you at dinner, Sir."

As the two exited the dormitory, all who remained were Welrod and Blair. The two stood in silence for a while, before Welrod spoke up.

"I suppose… not all Archibalds are complete and utter twats."

"Miss Welrod! Language!" Blair chuckled, before turning to her and adding, "I think the family line has hope yet, now after you Miss Welrod!"

Blair let Welrod pass in front of him before exiting the room. As they proceeded down the hall, Blair looked once more at Welrod's hair.

"You know… you look rather fitting with your hair let down, you should do it more often."

Welrod smiled before replying with, "Not in your lifetime Sir."

The two companions had a laugh as they continued down the hallway towards the dining hall, disappearing around the corner, as the dormitory door slowly shut.


	3. Commander Blair's Birthday Bash

**Commander's Blair's Birthday Bash**

"Ok, Miss WA2000, a little more to the right."

A loud groan erupted from the rifle T-doll as she leaned as far as she could on the ten foot tall ladder.

"What is the point of birthday parties anyway? Just seems like a waste of time to me..."

WA2000 was positioning the right end of the giant banner that was to span the entrance to the dining hall. Miss Enfield was casually holding the left side of the sign; being relatively tall certainly does have its benefits.

Welrod, the girl who was directing this escapade, realized how taxing this task was, however this mission was of the utmost importance; it was the commander's birthday after all. She had been planning this event for months, micromanaging everything down to the flavor of the frosting on the cake. Today was the day where everything was to be set in motion; revealing if Welrod's plans had been for naught.

 _It's been a tiresome endeavor, but it's worth it for a gentleman of his stature._

Welrod directed WA2000 as though she were a traffic officer; her arms waving in all directions. WA2000's arms were attempting to match the girl's movements, throwing her arms up, down, forwards, and backwards to position the corner just right. Welrod could tell her assistant was getting frustrated, the girl's groans increasing in volume and length.

"There, that's perfect Miss WA2000!" Welrod said, giving her two thumbs up once she was satisfied, only to get an exasperated sigh and an eye roll in return. Their task now complete, the two rifle dolls descended from their respective ladders, ready for new orders.

"Miss Lee, if you could assist Miss Grizzly in filling air into the balloons, I would truly appreciate it."

Lee, with a smile, turned to leave, but stopped mid turn to face Welrod, a mischievous grin now replacing the graceful one.

"Miss Welrod, may we have permission to use helium for the task?"

Welrod gave the request a long thought. While helium balloons could certainly cause issues, especially with the personalities on this base, Welrod trusted Lee's judgement and grace.

 _I suppose it's worth a shot._

"Permission granted, I am putting my trust in you Miss Lee, do not make me look foolish now," Welrod said, giving her friend a smile, although deep down she still felt immensely concerned.

Gleefully, the British rifle hustled off to tell Grizzly the good news. Welrod could see the girl with the aviators on give a fist pump, and run off with Lee to obtain tanks of helium gas. WA2000 in the meanwhile had been impatiently tapping her foot, awaiting the next order.

"Miss WA2000, your mission is to assist Miss Springfield in the kitchens…" Welrod began to say, turning to the girl in front of her.

The sniper's eyes lit up like a Fourth of July fireworks display, running off into the base's interior before her leader could finish her statement.

"...with carrying the food to the dining hall."

 _What have I done?_

Welrod pulled her radio out of her pocket, and took off sprinting after the WA2000. She switched to the channel that was connected to the kitchens, praying she was not too late.

"Miss Springfield, Do you copy over?"

A sweet voice returned the call out.

"Oh! Hello Wel-chan. I am pleased to say the commander's birthday cake is looking better by the second. Hold on one moment." The girl heard Springfield mutter something forcefully at an obscure T-Doll; as sweet as Springfield was, she did have a stern side to her, especially when she was focused on a task.

"My apologies Miss, FNC was trying to get an early sample of the commander's birthday cake. Children shouldn't ruin their appetites with sweets, should they little one?

Welrod had turned the corner and arrived at the kitchen, screeching to a halt in front of Springfield. The woman was finishing dressing the cake with a layer of white frosting.

Welrod stood in awe of the sight before her: a triple-layered, white frosted chocolate cake. The outside was decorated with various decorative candies, strawberries, the commander's favorite fruit, and edible G&K emblems. The cake itself towered above the dolls hurriedly rushing about the kitchen, at least seven feet in height, and that wasn't counting the table it was resting on.

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see WA2000 trying to help decide the tablecloths they would use that evening.

 _Goodness Gracious, crisis averted._

"Miss Springfield, how did you know to…?"

"Fufufu… Wel-chan, this isn't the first time I've had to deal with problem children. WA-Chan is busying herself with the place settings, however, isn't it also a problem for you to be here?" Springfield have the girl a sweet smile.

 _Dammit, she's right!_

"A-ah, yes. I shall return to the dining hall. Thank you, Miss Springfield, the cake looks splendid," the girl replied with a nod before racing back to the dining hall.

 _Lee and Grizzly should be done with the balloons by now. We should set a bundle of them on each table, and let the rest litter the ceiling. Yes, that would do nicely._

Welrod entered the dining hall, however, Grizzly and Lee were nowhere to be seen. Although, the girl did notice Calico and Suomi trying to set up the sound system, and sauntered over to see how they were progressing. The two girls in question were busy chatting about heavy metal bands, as they plugged in eight foot high speakers into the grand hall walls.

"Oh, hi there your majesty! Suomi and I are just finishing up the surround sound system. We are going to totally rock this hall tonight!" Calico said cheerfully, playing a little air guitar as Suomi happily unwound the microphone.

"We thought karaoke would be a fun way to celebrate the commander's birthday! I look forward to hearing what you have to sing Miss

Welrod!" Suomi said with a smile.

"O-oh, I-I don't think I'll be doing that… I-I'm quite dreadful behind the microphone," Welrod replied, embarrassed enough to turn a slight shade of pink, "A-Anyway, you two seem to have everything under control, well done!"

 _Mental note: Ask Commander for a raise in Suomi and Calico's pay. They earned it._

Suomi gleefully plugged the microphone into the speaker jack, and gave it a tap. The sound resonated around the room. The girl hummed a low chord into the microphone. This low tone reverberated around the room, off the walls, and through the fine glasses, each with a little G&K logo emblazoned on them, which were stacked neatly on top of the tables across from them. Welrod could see the glasses shaking ever so slightly. Suomi hummed a little louder, and suddenly, the glasses burst, showering bits of material over the table, floor, and poor G36 who was attempting to set the table.

 _Mental note: Disregard previous note._

"Uh… sorry Miss Welrod," The little girl said with a sheepish grin, "we have extra glasses right?" She looked at Welrod, who's right eye was slightly twitching.

 _No there aren't. In fact those were donations from Krueger himself._

"I'm sure we-we'll figure something out. Don't be too hard on yourself." Welrod gave the best smile she could muster at the moment; which turned into more of a grimace than anything else, her right eye continuing to twitch.

"Yo Welrod!"

 _Good, Grizzly is back. Hopefully something has gone smoothly._

Welrod turned around to face Grizzly, who was carrying Lee-Enfield over her shoulder. The two girls approached at a very leisurely pace, the kind a child uses to prolong their time before a punishment.

 _Where are the balloons?_

Welrod saw neither balloons, nor the helium tanks they were to use to fill them. Welrod met the two girls halfway; crossing her arms whilst looking the two up and down.

"Grizzly, where are the balloons, and… why are you carrying Lee?" Welrod's eyes narrowed a bit at her teammate.

"Uh yea, about that…" Grizzly was trying to avoid Welrod's glare, while Lee-Enfield could be heard giggling to herself.

"See… we made a discovery that helium makes your voice sound higher pitched." Grizzly had her eyes on her toes, not daring to look her superior in the eye, for good reason, as Welrod had intensified her glare.

"And?" Welrod started to tap her foot.

"So, Lee and I decided to have some fun, and we inhaled some helium."

"How much is some, Grizzly?"

The girl mumbled something under her breath. While Welrod missed it, Lee must have heard it, as her giggling intensified.

"What?"

"All of it, Welrod. We inhaled all of it. I… kind of goaded her into it. I encouraged her take a sniff, then two. Before I knew it she took on another and another. I tried to stop her, but Lee inhaled too much and started acting… well... like this." The girl tilted her head back at Lee, who was in the midst of a laughing fit.

"Y-you sounded so fuuuuuuuunny Grizzly Bear!" The normally composed woman had completely lost it!

Welrod brought her hand to her head, and glanced at her watch. Only ten minutes remained until the party started.

 _This is actually happening right now._

Welrod took a deep breath, letting the exhale calmly exhume from her mouth. She shot a determined, and slightly frustrated look at Grizzly.

"Right, then! Grizzly, you and Lee will have to do it the old fashioned way. I want as many balloons filled and ready to go in ten minutes!" She pointed from the girls to the pile of balloons.

Grizzly glanced at Lee, who was still out of control, and then back at Welrod. The girl raised her eyebrow.

"So… how exactly am I going to do that with Miss Crumpet over here acting… like a mad hatter?"

"Make do!" Welrod, exasperated, stormed off to find something, anything that had gone right. It was then the massive cake entered the dining hall.

 _Oh thank god, I can always count on Springfield to pick up the slack._

The woman she spoke of sauntered up to Welrod, a smile emblazoned on her face.

"Magnificent isn't it Wel-chan? It wasn't easy, but those 14 hours of baking were truly worth it. Oh, the Commander is going to be so pleased!" The woman clapped excitedly as the cake was positioned neatly on the table.

"Thank you, Miss Springfield. You truly came through in a pinch." Welrod gave the woman a nod and a smile, and once again glanced at her watch. Her face turned from bliss to concern.

 _Five minutes, and we have no eating utensils. This absolutely won't do. Oh, the Commander is going to be unhappy isn't he?_

Suddenly, Calico burst through the door with a large utility cart. The girl had located boxes of plastic cups, silverware, and plates. She ran up to the two women, with her quarry in tow.

"Look what I found!" Calico turned towards the cart, shaking her hands enthusiastically.

 _Well, they aren't extravagant enough for the commander, but it will suffice given the circumstances._

Every doll in the hall quickly set to work finishing up the decorations and setting the "fine dining" utensils out on the lengthy ballroom tables. Grizzly had hurriedly blown up enough balloons to have one per table, while Lee sat next to her giggling like a schoolgirl.

Just as the last utensil was put in place, Kalina rushed into the hall with a gaggle of other dolls in tow.

"The Commander is on his way! Quick douse the lights!" Springfield activated the switch, casting a blanket of darkness on the hall. Welrod could hear muffled voices approaching the entrance. The door opened, casting the hallway light into the dining hall. Two figures stood in the doorway, one appeared to be a Doll while the other was the commander.

"M-mister, there are monsters in there! I'm mighty scared, could you go and flush em out?" Single Action Army was putting on her best performance.

"Of course, little miss, I'll scare those monsters right out of their shoes!" The man slowly walked into the dining hall, as the doors shut behind him, returning the room to complete darkness. At that moment Springfield flipped on the generator, filling the room with bright light. All of the Dolls rose from their hiding places and yelled, "Surprise! Happy Birthday Commander!"

The commander, who at first was on high alert, slowly relaxed and received the congratulations of the T-Dolls around him. Calico grabbed a microphone and brought it over to the commander, motioning for him to speak. Commander Blair leaned over and spoke into the microphone.

"I-I honestly don't know what to say. I'm touched you would remember by birthday. This spirit, this comradery, this family, this is what G&K is all about. Now, enough talk, I see Springfield has prepared us a wonderful cake!"

With a cheer, the T-Dolls lined up single file behind the commander, as Springfield handed the commander a large slice, with extra frosting.

"I can't wait! This is gonna be sweet!" Calico fist bumped Grizzly.

"Hell yes it is! I call dibs on the corner piece!" Grizzly called out over the din of other T-Dolls.

"Uhh, my head, w-what happened?" Lee-Enfield had returned to her now dulled senses.

"I'll tell you later," whispered Grizzly, patting the girl on the back.

Welrod glanced at WA2000, who was looking surprisingly cheerful.

"You're in a good mood Miss WA2000."

"Oh… well I know the commander is an idiot, but even he deserves to be happy on his birthday I guess. That, and I can't wait to see how he likes the cake, especially after what I added."

The entire echelon turned in unison towards the beaming sniper and yelled, "You what?!"

"What?! Springfield's cooking is so boring. I wanted to spice it up a bit! So while you and Springfield were talking Welrod, I added something nice!" WA2000 pouted, puffing out her cheeks and crossing her arms.

Frantically, Welrod jerked her head towards the commander who had just sunk his fork into the cake. The utensil slowly approached his mouth, the weapon of mass destruction inching closer. Welrod tried to cut the line and intercept the "poisoned dish" but it was too late. All Welrod could do was yell, "Commander no!" as Eric Blair chomped down on the morsel.

 _Several hours later._

"S-sir, are you alright in there?" Welrod called out, knocking on the facility bathroom door.

"D-dying… mostly… how are you?" The Commander replied weakly. This was followed by all manner of nasty sounds, conjuring up horrible imagery in the girl's mind.

"Sir… I-I'm sorry the party was a bust. We r-ruined your big day." The girl sniffed; wiping her right eye.

"Oh, it's just another number, I wouldn't be too…" the poor man couldn't finish his statement before losing his lunch... again.

The girl looked down at her feet, and wiped her eyes again.

The commander opened the door, and stumbled out. Upon seeing Welrod visibly upset, he straightened up and looked her in the eye.

"Miss Welrod, I'm assuming the facility has devoured the feast Miss Springfield so kindly prepared?" The Commander asked, smiling.

"Y-yes Sir, I'm sorry, we tried to hold out, but people wouldn't wait, and they-"

"Shh, it's alright." Eric walked over and gave the girl a hug. "I have a feeling that you planned the whole thing. You have no idea how happy today has made me, indigestion aside of course." The man laughed, which caused Welrod to lighten up and join in.

"Although, there is something else you could do that would mean the world to me."

"What's that Sir?" The girl asked nervously.

"Why, another chess game of course! I've got to keep the win streak alive! Come on then!" The Commander hurried back to his office, while Welrod stood in the hallway in silence, a smile growing on her face.

 _Charming, as always Sir._

The girl chased after her superior, the two spending the rest of the evening in a battle of wits.


End file.
